Pursuit of Happiness - Inside and Out goals
"You can't have what you want until you want what you have"
One of my "live by" quotes is one I read decades ago. It struck me very deeply then as a young adult, chasing dreams. We all have those moments, sometimes we forget them, but it is so worth reflecting on them. It was a time in my life where you are ambitious and planning for the future, all your desires. Seeing that quote grounded me, reminded me that I should remember in my pursuit of more, that what I already had was once something I pursued, that more is always an illusion. Fundemently I believe we spend to much time in the pursuit of happiness, and there we don't see that we are in the presence of it - and to see it, we need to take a moment in gratitude, to first want what you have.
We are going into Winter, a time of hibernation typically, I want to rewrite the narrative. With our winter challenge, let's to use this time on reflecting where we come from and where we really want to be. All too often we focus on goals that are visible, I challenge you to also focus on the healthy goals and habits that are not visible, Inside and Out goals!
I read an article where a woman wrote a letter to her younger self, and I thought this is such a good idea. A good way to look back and reflect, but also a way to think back on our dreams we once had, to know that in so many ways, we have everything we wanted once, and the need for more is often psychological.
So as you enter the winter months and challenge yourself, consider reflecting back as you ponder your goals going forward. Write your own letter!, then set your winter goals. It is never too late to make a change!
Dear 16 year old me
I know that regardless of the fact that you will think you know better, I am still going to try share my advice, hoping it will plant a seed to grow inside you.
You are so focused, this is good, but I hope you make some space in your life for spontaneity, because your path ahead is never going to be a straight line.
Sometimes stuff just happens, and you will feel helpless. It will be hard, many times, but know that everything be alright in the end, and if its not alright - its not the end. Every tough time will be a challenge, but your life will always be better for that growth and for facing it. You can seldom fully appreciate the good times without the perspective of knowing the tough times.
Please love yourself more. You are so tough on yourself, so hard on your body, your mind that you forget to appreciate how awesome you are. You try so hard to be nice to everyone, please everyone else, but I wish you can remember that you matter too. You are no good to anyone if you exhausted!
Love your body, its is so much better than any mirror reflection projects. Be kind to your mind, it is so sensitive and feels so much. You will feel so overwhelmed sometimes, that will be hard but those feelings will becomes easier to process, and that which you see as a curse will one day be seen as a blessing. Trust yourself more, trust your gut, trust your feelings and yourself.
You are a good person. You will make mistakes, many. You will think you know it all at times and will fall from grace. More than once. We are NOT the sum of our mistakes. Your will learn and grow each time, and realise that you are better for it. As Oprah will soon teach you - when you know better, DO better! Good intentions do matter, even in failure.
Time may seem slow now, but it does move at a mind bending pace so live presently. Savour those moments of bliss, those quiet moments, those crazy moments, those intense moments. Remember to tell those you love that you love them, and again. In the end, that is what matters, those connections, those people. Do and be more with those that matter, less with what does not.
Remember, faith, hope and love - the greatest of these is always LOVE.